In conversation with God

People think I’m Hindu. Why? Why not, I was born in a Hindu family. I therefore inherited Hinduism from my parents. I am because they are. Nobody ever asked me after I entered my adulthood if I was OK being called a Hindu, or if I wanted to take up any other religious identity. That was such a given. Ever since I was a kid, I used to wonder what religion was. Was it the various ways of praying to god? Then how different would that be from rituals? Would I really have to travel to a place of worship only to say something to god, and that too via priests? That was the journey of an inquisitive young mind going through an evolution of temporal understanding. My parents had contrasting religious ideologies despite both being Hindus, but I’d never seen them debate or openly disagree on their beliefs. That’s the mutual respect they had. Thanks to that, I was given the space a young mind needed to independently grasp things. I grew up amidst a blended culture of blind belief and logical reasoning that laid the foundation on which I could one day build my own belief system devoid of any born biases.

I’d often ask myself, where does god reside? Many learned people have likened god to our inner self. Then what do we see thousands of places of worship for? Why do we see millions of pilgrims every year traveling all over the world to go and pray at various ‘holy’ places? What is so sacred about those places that makes them more appealing than our inner self? I’ve often wondered whether it’s not severely undermining god’s omnipresence if we start believing we need to or can ‘capture’ god within the four walls of a man-made erection. None of the temples, mosques or churches are older than humans. We built them. At a time we had none of these installations in the world, where was god? And now that we have hundreds of thousands of them, have we actually been able to ‘contain’ god? I haven’t been able to come to terms with this comic paradox. We see temples being built on playgrounds; places where kids would play. As soon as we have a temple there, god (or gods) starts ‘living’ there? Has anyone ever heard anything funnier than that?

An innocent question I often ask believers is: why do you go to a temple or a church? My intention is never to challenge or question them or their belief. I ask to learn. Sadly, nobody has been able to give me an answer that could convince me. On rare occasions, I’ve been told, ‘I go there to thank god for creating me and keeping me alive and healthy.’ I don’t know how truthful such answers are, but this idea of feeling thankful to one’s creator seems fascinating. That’s humility. But does it stop there? Don’t we always have a list of demands to put forward to god? One of my lady friends gave an interesting answer to me on this. She said, ‘God to me is like my father and I’m like a child to him. He’s the one I can openly talk to. He’s the one who has created me and can influence my life the way he wants. There’s nothing wrong in me asking him to fulfill my wishes.’ How does one, however, explain the bribes we offer god, in the form of hair or other physical valuables? Why do I see commercial trade-offs in the form of attempts to strike deals with divine blessings in lieu of something earthly?

One of the evilest inventions by humans is institutionalized religion. Rituals are the icing on the cake. All religious books were written by wise people who were driven by an urge to help the masses understand various ways to comprehend god. The everlasting damage was caused by the most privileged classes of all societies across the board, who had access to education and therefore had an edge over others. They soon claimed custody of those scriptures. The common man and woman didn’t have the means to learn the languages in which these books had been written. They had to therefore go to the middlemen so their prayers could reach god. These priests and middlemen, for whom it had already become a way to earn a living, started misinterpreting the teachings of the scriptures. They cleverly devised the most efficient way to protect the monopoly of themselves in an unchallenged manner; that was to create fear. Fear is a universal conqueror wherever there is unknown and unseen. The common people historically have had a miserable life. All that has always mattered to them is how they can elevate to a better life. Religion soon became a vehicle of change for them. They were made to believe if they followed certain rituals, their sins would be lessened and they could hope for a better life when they would be reborn. Seriously?

Anything to do between god and humans is an extremely private affair. No books, no religions, no damn rituals have any business there. When you talk to your father, you don’t hire expert professionals to facilitate a dialogue. Then why do you need to be escorted by priests when you have to offer something to your own creator? Has god become so inaccessible? If yes, I’m better off without such an understanding of god. If he creates and then expects his creations to go through brokers for a simple prayer, I must question his method. Aren’t we told he creates everyone with a purpose? Then how can be become so oblivious of his own children? Sorry, I can’t accept someone who’s said to be omnipresent, to be so whimsical! These middlemen are self-proclaimed godmen who, we’ve believed for long, have special powers to get us closer to god. Some friends of mine who represent these ‘sects’ have told me it’s an art their predecessors have mastered, and hence prayers offered through them are more likely to reach god quicker in a more effective manner. This argument is not even funny! This is deplorable.

Despite not having any respect for institutionalized religion, I’ve gone to many temples and have spoken to people who believe in the power of these places of worship. Many have explained to me rather scientifically, how electro-magnetic energy and the positive vibe of all devotees collectively could make a welcome impact to people’s life. While scientific rendering of any phenomenon must be considered seriously, I’ve never found selfless devotion (‘bhakti’) anywhere. Most of us go to temples out of two reasons: fear and greed. Fear because I’ve been told by my parents and elders that there is a negative consequence of not doing the conventional, and by questioning the status quo you may anger god who in turn could curse you. As if devotees’ lives aren’t already cursed! Why else are you in a temple anyway? Greed is because god is perceived as someone who could give what you ask for. Great, so I can ask for good health, wealth, education for my children, promotion at the workplace. I can also ask for bad things to happen to people I don’t like. Come on, give god a break. Take charge of your life to the extent possible. Try and understand the laws of cause and effect. For your own god’s sake, please ask questions.

If you have a great life, but if you have never asked any questions to understand yourself and your surroundings better, do you think god would be proud of you? On the contrary, he must be embarrassed because of you; you’ve only asked things from him. What have you given in return? Have you ever told him you wanted to apply your brain in analyzing things around you? Have you ever told him you wished to ask questions so you could learn more about god, rather than be mystified by what you’ve been told by others? Have you ever told him you wanted to come out of the prejudices of fear and greed and wished to thank him unconditionally for everything he has or has not given you? God definitely deserves a better deal. I’m sure he doesn’t feel great about people he’s given intellect to, who choose to remain dumb! 

I have been branded differently by people who know my off-beat understanding of religion. With all humility, however, I can say I’m more religious than many of them. I preach less and practice more. I observe honesty and few more humanly virtues through my deeds. My methods could be different, but I’m certainly trying to do my bit to my creator by asking questions and getting closer to him. That’s the divinest journey we all are meant to cruise along!